I have a boyfriend and I don’t know what to do with him.
Mr. Outdoorsy Tech is great. He’s fun, cool, cute. He showed up the other night with a bottle of wine and a DVD after my kids went to bed, and didn’t blink an eye when little bro woke up in the middle of the night.
He’s adventurous and funny. He has a good job and owns a home.
He is a parent too.
But here’s the thing… I’ve been alone for over a year now. I like it. I spread out in my bed and enjoy my quiet time.
The good news is I’m comfortable on my own. I’m not miserable anymore. I’m not stalking my almost-ex-husband (divorce takes a long time!) and I’m not drinking with friends every night to avoid the stillness in my home. I have a program and a support system. I have hobbies I enjoy and I don’t feel lonely.
Which could be why, after only a few months of online dating, I met a quality guy. Or one I’d like to get to know better, anyway.
And instead of worrying about whether he’s in debt, or a secret pedophile, or perhaps harboring a gambling addiction, I’m just enjoying him. We’ve both gone out and stayed in and I’m having fun, letting him show me who he is by being laid back, instead of controlling every situation (my prior MO) or freaking out if he doesn’t call.
So what do I do with this boyfriend?
He slept over for the first time the other night. I hadn’t shared my bed with anyone in nearly a year. He wrapped his arms around me and dozed off. I laid there, uncomfortable but cozy, comforted yet unable to sleep, all at the same time. Then he started snoring. Yikes. I like the boyfriend experience–dinners out, cuddling, sex (thank God!)–but snoring? Really? I mean, isn’t getting rid of the snoring man one of the benefits of divorce?
Yeesh. I’m going to take a deep breath and muddle through this, one day at a time. I’m focusing on what I appreciate about him instead of what I don’t but… is it too early to ask him to roll over? Or wear a breathe right strip?
I have a boyfriend.