New Dating Rule? No Sweet Nothings


After we got naked and nearly had sex, we cuddled. I wasn’t ready. It was only our third date. He seemed alright with that, understanding, even.

The next day? I got texts about how cold it was on his run.

I wanted a text or even better, a phone call, that went like this: I had an amazing time last night! Thanks for getting together, beautiful.

Or maybe, Hey sexy! Thinking of you. When can I see you again?

No sweet nothings. Nada. Days went by and Running Man continued with an irregular patter of boring updates about his day. No request for a fourth date. No flirty chatter.

I started worrying, did my stretch marks turn him off? Is he like Mr. Landing Strip and looking for more of a Brazilian situation? Was he just in it to get laid?

I hate this anxiety. And the kicker is, I don’t even care that much. I’m not crazy about him. I’ve got more guys texting me and sending me Match and Tinder messages than I know what to do with.

I guess I’m upset because he violated my old-fashioned sense of courtesy which dictates that guys should call a girl the day after you take her panties off.

Hell, even my DivorceMoon fling FaceTimed me the next day. We live thousands of miles apart but I sensed that he did because it was the gentlemanly thing to do. It was fun. Flirty. And great closure. We never spoke again.

When I get angry or scared or anxious I tend to make rules to protect myself. Right now I feel like writing a new rule in black ink: If I take my clothes off with a man he should call me the next day, or at least send a sweet text. If he doesn’t, no more. On to the next guy.

But I worry that’s expecting too much.

What do you think? Am I old-fashioned? Are my expectations too high?

Ladies, do you need a call like that after you have any kind of sex, oral or other?

Gentleman, do you follow-up with a call if you’re really into a girl?