How to Get Blocked on Tinder

1. Heyyyyy Sexy Lady! If you mention that I’m curvy or open with “Hey sexy!” I will block you. Yes, I want you to think I’m sexy and I even hope to get laid again real soon, but treat me like the class act I pretend to be, mmmm kay?

2. Song lyrics, especially country lyrics. If you quote a song instead of writing something original, I assume you are both boring and dumb. Since I’m fun and smart, we clearly will not get along.

3. The Compliment Fisher.
Actual exchange:
Dude: “Hey, you’re too pretty to be on Tinder.”
Me: “Shit! Well, where’s the app for hot people?”
Dude: “You don’t think I’m hot?”
Me: “I do like a guy in glasses.”
Dude: “Yeah but what about the rest?”
That’s when I blocked him. Too much work already, my friend!

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2 thoughts on “How to Get Blocked on Tinder

  1. Ugh! I don’t blame you. My best friend and I used to joke that we were gonna start a class or blog or something to help people learn the basics of dating and interacting online with the hopes of dating. Some people are so clueless. Shit that won’t fly: “What’s up, you dead-sexy bitch?” — seriously! What is wrong with people? She once dated a guy for about a month and it was going well until he pulled over to pee on the side of the road, rolled the passenger seat window down and walked around and carried on a conversation with her while he was urinating — didn’t bother covering himself or anything and then shook off his drip and a drop of pee hit her hand. Gross!!! I have a feeling you could add a lot of don’ts to that class.

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